Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Politics & The Natural Order of Primate Organizations

Compiled and Edited by Steven Solomon © 1992


"Let's Get Metaphysical"

As noted in the preface to this volume, Saurian did, indeed, go to the gallows on the morning of November 30th, 1955. There he did hang for several minutes, neck clearly broken, face ashen with the pallor of death, eyeballs bulging, tongue swollen and black. His apparently lifeless body was eventually cut down before the taunts of an angry mob and swiftly transported to the local morgue; the same where he had so recently found employment. All this I saw with my own eyes. It is also known, however, that the corpse was somehow misplaced from the coroner's freeezer prior to a final dispensation of those remains in the laboratory crematorium. Precisely how this occurred is unclear.

Neither can we offer any rationally credible explanation as to how the Professor might have arranged, subsequent to his vertebra snapping descent to the end of the rope, passage aboard the freighter Felicity; she being bound for Groote Eylandt, off the coast of Australia's Northern Territory. Yet, we cannot dismiss the fact that an individual bearing both Saurian's identity and physiognomy was positively identified by several of the Felicity's crew as having embarked on a weeks-long voyage from the Philippines that began on December 1st, 1955. He was recalled as a man fond of strong drink, always ready with a tall tale and mighty handy with a sea chanty. The ship's cook was particularly impressed with the fellow's ability to eviscerate a large fish with a single, deft flick of the long straight-razor sheathed in his vest pocket.

The Australian authorities were warned by their Philippino peers of the likelyhood that a flesh-eating necromaniac had walked away from his own hanging and was bound for their shores. To the Aussie's consternation, this man escaped a waiting snare, presumably as the ship steamed into port under cover of night. To effect such an escape, he would, of course, had to have swum some several kilometers through treacherous waters infested with poisonous eels, stinging rays, Men'o'War, Hammer-head and Great White sharks. Not surprisingly, the local authorities found no trace of him during the several weeks following Felicity's arrival. Owing to the likelyhood that upon jumping ship he had drown, been eaten, or both, the official search was soon given up.

Today, we know that the intelligence communities of the United States and USSR, as well as several organizations with ties to Stroessner's Paraguay (including Israeli Mossad, West German CIA, East German Stassi, South African Ministry of Science, the Cosa Nostra, and others), harbored real doubt and attendant concerns regarding Saurian's evident departure from life's stage. All involved had already seen or heard too much of his gift for survival to be so blithe in presuming him a meal for the fishes. All alternatively wanted either his services or his scalp, a live Professor beneath it being optional.

Documents only recently declassified reveal the substantial bounty placed upon his head, with each of the above named organizations at one time or another supplying their own significant piece of the action. By 1963 this bounty would total eight-million dollars; this while the Professor is known to have lent his skills to one or more of those very parties endeavoring to hasten his demise. Even before the Kennedy assasination, for which there is only contradictory evidence of his involvement, it seems as though in every corner of the world was someone who wanted Saurian killed and was willing to pay dearly to see this deed done.

For his part, Saurian was keenly aware of the heat burning at his heels. He sought respite, sometimes with desperation, yet remained eager to eventually resume his Great Work. Alas, this would have to wait. Unable to find a secure base of operation for most of the next decade, Professor Saurian would forgo practical investigations of any substantive nature. While maintaining a modest level of self experimentation, the greatest portion of his bountiful curiosity and intellectual zeal was concentrated in more ephemeral inquiries; explorations of natural philosophy in that dark forest where the paths of politics and science ceaselessly weave never to fully merge nor emerge into the light of full understanding.

During this period, given the necessity of putting food on the table, Saurian punched the clock for a series of intelligence agencies and their kindred, outrightly criminal enterprises. Given the pressures upon him, it is not surprising that Saurian's great mind could not but ponder the miracle that is so-called civilized man; who is he, where did he come from, and where is he going?

We will rejoin his correspondence with Doktor D. in the late summer of 1956. Ed.

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